By Tudor Sirbu
Back in December 2019, I was at a local dance party in the north of England, as I often was. It was a beautiful venue with twinkly lights, where many friends often came to dance—a space I always deemed safe. However, much to my surprise, that sense of safety was about to change.
Back in December 2019, I was at a local dance party in the north of England, as I often was.
It was a beautiful venue with twinkly lights, where many friends often came to dance—a space I always deemed safe. However, much to my surprise, that sense of safety was about to change.
While dancing with one of my male friends, two women walked confidently to the middle of the dance floor, among tens of other dancers, and pulled us apart. Although odd looks when I followed, as a man, were quite common, this was a shocking experience. We stopped, and it felt like everything suddenly moved in slow motion; I couldn’t even hear the music anymore. I asked them what they were doing,and they ran off.
I finished dancing with my friend and then went to confront them to try to understand what had happened. Much to my shock, when I asked them, they blatantly said, “We didn’t think two men would want to dance together.” The historical heteronormativity of social dancing was so ingrained in them that they didnot realise that we were two adults who chose to dance together—after all, no one forced us.
For them, it was a fleeting moment; however, for me, those words rang in my ears for a long time afterwards. Suddenly, the feeling that my local dance community was a safe space shattered, creating an instant reaction to avoid that party and even stop following altogether. And for a while, that’s exactly what I did.
Fortunately, my passion and love for Bachata were stronger than my hurt. I returned to being myself—ignoring the odd looks, attending the few classes where I could follow and where appropriate language was used—where I wasn’t a “lady” just because I followed.
Little did I know that 1,400 km away, at around the same time, a revolution was brewing. Felipe and Tiago were starting one of the biggest inclusivity movements in social dancing history. A movement that, while maybe aimed at just creating a more inclusive dancing environment for all, has had so many ripples that improved thegeneral mentality about how we learn to dance, boundaries, and safety.
Change is hard, and people find it even harder. So to imagine what was achieved in just five years almost feels uncanny—all thanks to Role Rotation. The movement has inspired so many people to try the other role. This has led to a significant change inmentality across the board. More leaders than ever now understand what it takes torespond to their lead and how important it is for them to be mindful of their partner’s ability. Equally, more and more followers are understanding the intricacies of leading, thus being more open to working with their dance partners in a constructive way to help them improve their leading. Again, all due to exposure to Role Rotation.
Nowadays, I rarely attend a party in the north of England where there isn’t at least one role rotation dancer. More teachers than ever are aware of their language in classes, ensuring that they use “leader” and “follower.” Regularly, a wave of new social dancers starts off with the freedom of choosing what role suits them more while learning both. All incredibly powerful transformations for the future.
Whether you realise it or not, as a role rotation community member, with every rolerotation dance, you normalise making dancing a conversation between any twopeople rather than a gender-bound interrogation. You inspire others to becomfortable trying the other role and thus make dancing more inclusive for all.
This is just the beginning, though! Role Rotation, Felipe and Tiago, and their world-wide community have achieved a lot in just five years; however, their work—our work—is not done yet.
We’ve made great strides in many major Western European cities, butthere is still a lot more fighting needed to achieve an inclusive and respectful environment for all and equal opportunities for all dancing professionals around the world.
One thing is very clear:
we can all do our part!
Representation matters so, so much—at a higher level or local level! By being an inclusivity ally in our local communities, weare setting the right example for the new generation of social dancers.
It all starts with us!
